If I had known when I was, say, 18, that I would be diagnosed with MS, and that I would be in a wheelchair, and that I would become a quadriplegic, what would I have done differently? 

The most popular answer to questions like this is: “I wouldn’t have done anything differently.” Only liars or fools believe this. Plus, it’s not a very interesting response. Let’s do interesting instead.

Things I Would Have Done Differently, Had I Known

1. I would have purchased tons of long-term healthcare insurance, disability insurance, and life insurance.

Although this would be practical and truthful, it’s not very interesting. My apologies. Let’s try again.

1. I would have climbed mountains, jumped out of airplanes, and run marathons.

Much more interesting, but not very truthful. No, I never wanted to do those things. Let’s start over.

1. I would have made home modifications…

Dammit. Still not interesting. Maybe I need to look at it another way.

Yes, I would have done all sorts of practical things to prepare myself for what was coming. But what would I have changed about myself? How would I have prepared mentally, emotionally? Would I have become more compassionate toward the underprivileged? Would I have tapped into my creative side and started writing sooner? Would I have become more understanding, more empathetic, and less critical? Would I have begun living in the moment and worrying less about the past and the future? Would I have developed this inner peace that has descended upon me in recent years?

These are all transformations I experienced after I became disabled. I don’t believe, however, that any of these changes would have resulted merely from knowledge of what the future held. My newfound wisdom and tranquility could not have been hastened by a crystal ball. They had to be forged from everyday struggles.

So, other than a few logistical changes like insurance and house accessibility, if I had known when I was 18 what I know now, I wouldn’t have changed a thing. Using my own words, does this make me a liar or a fool? Perhaps I need to rethink that. 

The fact that I lived through these changes, rather than just knew about them, made me a more interesting and grounded writer and a better human being.